So much to say…

July 17, 2009 at 3:25 pm (Bitch, Bitch, Bitch, Daily Ramblings, Thought of the Day)

I have been thinking about this post for quite some time. I started this blog on the premise that I would learn about writing (something that I enjoy) and I would grow. Lately it seems I write about the same thing over and over again, so I am going to change it up a bit and actually talk about my past.

Now, I don’t usually talk about my past without forming some sort of blockade over my heart and soul for fear that people will judge and throw my family into a statistic, but I feel as though I haven’t been myself and I should probably drop the facade and let everyone see me. I’m told I’m not so bad, so we shall see!

The Younger Years:
I was born in Rockford, IL to my mom and dad who had been together since high school, with a short break in the relationship around college. My sister is 15 months older then me and I already posted about her so I’m going to skip that whole saga. My mom’s side of the family is mainly in Illinois where I was born and raised until I was 13. My dad’s side of the family is scattered around Illinois, Wisconsin, and some distant relatives in Texas. Basically I remember my childhood being great, we never had a lot of money but no one ever KNEW we were broke! Things started getting rocky right before we moved out of Illinois, my mom became an alcoholic and my sister and I basically took care of her while my dad was at the Fire Department and finishing up his classes to become a paramedic. We moved to our dream house but couldn’t afford it any longer when my mom started to “work from home” and we ended up moving in with my Aunt and Uncle for 9 months in Wisconsin. Eventually my dad got a better job offer in Nebraska so we moved there! Things just got more turbulent and ugly with my mom’s drinking and she also abused prescription drugs and had to be taken to different hospitals (medical and psychiatric) on numerous occasions. Most of the details I can’t remember which I think is why I’m so well adjusted now and don’t hold any grudges with my mom or my dad. Anyway, when my mom and dad separated I became a TOTAL daddy’s girl (I always was one, but mom was there to spend time with too) and completely rebelled against everyone and everything. I worked to help pay bills and stayed out to all hours of the night, making up for some of the adolescent years I lost. I started smoking (marijauna) and getting into some crappy situations (never with the police, but still) so I moved to New York where my mom had moved in with her boyfriend at the time. It almost killed me to leave my dad and move away but we both knew it was for the best. I straightened out and went to college, met M., and now we are two crazy people sharing our lives that have wacko parents! Somedays I get annoyed with my mom if I think shes been drinking, it’s unconscious I don’t realize I’m doing it until we are in a full blown fight. So I grew up in a somewhat turbulent home, but it really has helped me grow into the strongwilled and independent women that I am today!

YAY for Fridays right?!


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